Happy Days

As we start our fifth week on this journey (47 more to go!), I am newly conscious that this is a sabbatical, not a vacation. It is an opportunity to consciously construct a life, albeit for a defined period of time, that is what we want it to be. But without the external constraints that have defined our lives, I’m not sure

On reflection, this is the fourth time in five years I've had the opportunity to redefine my daily life (when I stepped down as CEO of Mobile Serve, when I started Future of Work, when COVID hit, and now). But it's the first time my family is doing it with me.

I have read a ton over ten years about how hyper-accomplished people spend their days (Do all your work AND yoga AND exercise AND don't look at your phone AND eat a healthy dinner with your family every night AND read a half an hour a day).

But what I’m starting to get interested in is how “happy” people spend their days.

The goal of this year is not productivity or health or accomplishment. It’s about happy, now and in the future.

1) Happy days start slowly

I love a morning that starts with slinking to the kitchen or a cafe for a coffee and a quiet space to just breathe. In our small Paris apartment, that meant the cafe below us. In Porto, it meant the building rooftop. In Normandy, our (often chilly) yard. In Croatia, the (much warmer) deck.

b) Being intentional about the day

A trap of mine, and I think one for many high-performing people, is the never-ending to-do list. For the last decade even when I accomplished what I set out to do for a day or a week, I then immediately added new things in to fill that space - or looking to accomplish things that could easily wait until tomorrow (which creates more work more quickly).

So now, I'm starting my days with what I will feel good about doing TODAY. I split these into "Must accomplish" and "it would be nice if…” The rest gets left on the list so it doesn't get lost- but I'm not worried about it.

III) There are goals:

Almost every day, we do something productive. Maybe it's the American cemetery at Normandy, or the Henry the Navigator monument in Lisbon, or the pig themed stain-glassed window at St. Eustace, or walking the walls of Old Town Dubrovnik.

Some days it's just getting place to place. Sometimes it's stuff that has to happen at home or grading the kids school work. But every day there’s a meaningful thing that needs to get done.

5) There is transition time

It takes us a while to get out the door. Even when we set a time, get everyone dressed, fed and bathroomed, it still seems that the actual moment of departure requires more last-minute things than it should. Or until the last second, a card-game or Backgammon game or cup of coffee, or online bank- checking or something makes the last moments a flurry of yelling and hurrying that would have made me stressed and upset.

I'm trying to learn to relax into it.

It’s my choice to either be irritated or take that moment to have a conversation with whoever is ready or enjoy the sun outside or.... whatever.

If we're late, then we're late. I get to decide my attitude toward it

You could be ready to be out the door. Or finish the game.

e) Be present to the people who are present

I have a whole different about my persistent struggles with this.

7) There is unscheduled time

Having cut so many things out of my life, I'm trying not to just recreate that with different activities. I can hear the "Easy for you to say Mr. Part-time-on-sabbatical.” When I left MobileServe and was “between gigs” for several months, more than one person reflected that I seemed basically just as busy + yoga. Even with the bring line of leaving the country, it's been incredibly hard not to just refill one kind of productivity for another.

The blog, the logistics, the kids, work, outreach on stuff at home, postcards, writing a book, writing a second book. All of those things beckon. And they all do have some place → just not all the space.

It’s the unscheduled time that lets us explore the less trod paths and be open to the experiences that just pop up and the people we meet.